Vent Vent Sigh

it really amazes me how much of your self esteem is tied up in your work. .your job..the life blood that is supposed to fill you with joy, and pride, and feelings of self worth can turn around and slap you upside the head and send you screaming into a fit of anger, frustration and self deprecating remarks in a heart beat. "why?" i mean really...why? why do we do this to ourselves? you know that you have done your best...busted your arse even and yet still..those thoughts come flooding in. alternating between....what did i do wrong? what could i have done better? rethinking every encounter, every meeting, every casual conversation in the hall or staff room. desperately trying to put it all together, find the flaw. and if your not thinking about how much you suck..your thinking "who the hell do they think they are?" "they should be looking at themselves before they start pointing fingers." righteous indignation...rehashing all the trials and tribulations that you have had to deal for months...the lack of respect for your work and professionalism..wanting to walk in and yell all the indignities you have been forced to endure in their faces.

"will this help?" nope..not even a little. "so what to do?" my suggestion is to stop thinking about it..let it ride and see how it all plays out. the fat lady has not sung..no one has kicked the bucket..the hot, brooding cowboy hasn't ridden off into the sunset and tomorrow is another day :)

p.s. thanks